When you’re a new mom, or new to a city, school, or play group, making new friends can be intimidating to some. But you can do it! Take a look at these simple ways to meet some new moms and make some new friends.
Making New Mom Friends
Start When Your Child is an Infant
Why? Because you and baby both need friends. And when the babies are sleeping, it gives you and your new friend time to bond and get to know each other; at this point, the play dates are more for you than the babies!
Your baby will also get used to having other children around, learning to share, and learning to play with others.
Don’t Do Too Much
If you do “too much” of any of these things, the kids probably won’t adjust well to the play date:
Too Much Time: An hour play date is ideal, anymore than that and kids tend to get cranky, or tired, or hungry . . . or all of the above!
Too Many Kids: Any more than about 4Ã¢â‚¬â€œ6 children just gets out of control and hard to handle . . . for both the moms and the kids.
Too Many Play Dates: If you schedule play dates everyday of the week, chances are both you and your child will get burned out quickly. Children (and moms!) need some down time, and being around so many people and so many activities all the time can get old quickly.
Expect Some Temper Tantrums
Let’s face it, you put kids in a room together with toys or at the park, and they’re bound to fight!
One way to teach children to share is by saying something simple yet direct: “No, it’s Jennifer’s turn.” If that doesn’t work, try distraction. Have another toy ready for your child to play with.
If your child pushes, hits, or bites, address it immediately. For older infants, hold their hands and sternly say, ‘No hit.’” Once your child is old enough for a time-out (around 18 months to 2 years), you can give him one as soon as the incident takes place. If it continues, put him in his room if you are hosting or leave for home if you’re not.
Dealing With Mommy Cliques
So you’re the mom of a child in a new school, new play group, new whatever. Chances are, there’s going to be at least one mommy “clique” you’ll notice immediately. Yep, mommy cliques are real. Just as there are kid cliques, there are ones for us moms, too.
If you’re hoping to become part of the group, you can . . . but it will take some work on your part. Watch the group and you’ll find there are one or two “ringleaders” . . . steer clear of them. Instead, watch for someone who is “in” the group already who is friendly and approachable. Chat with her when she’s alone or maybe with just one or two other parents.
When the time is right, ask a question to shift the conversation to the group: “Do you all get together for playdates? I’d love to meet some of the other moms.” If she tries to shy away from answering or does not throw out an invite, don’t take it personally (easy said than done!). Try to find someone else that you do click with, and don’t worry about whether she’s part of the “cool crowd” or not.
What tips can you suggest to make meeting new friends easier?