How to Keep Your Kids from Being Abducted

by Deborah Cruz on May 11, 2012

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Remember in elementary school when Officer Friendly would come to class and teach you all about stranger danger? Well, it seems that world has only gotten to be a scarier place, or I am more frightened by the things that go bump in the night because I am a mother now.

Either way, one of my biggest fears is that my child will be abducted or hurt. I don’t know that I could survive the pain of the loss.

I am very adamant about teaching my girls a few key tactics to try to avoid being abducted or at the very least help them get away if some monster were to ever attempt such a horrific act. More importantly, children need to be aware that sometimes monsters come in the form of someone they already know. Sometimes the stranger is a beautiful young woman or a handsome neighbor boy, but if they are not a child’s parent they should not be taking a child off by themselves, ever.

Secret word: My girls know that if anyone comes to pick them up and says “ Your mom sent me,” one, they should run away immediately and if by some chance they don’t or the school doesn’t figure it out, a secret word is to be requested. No one knows this word but my husband, my children and myself.

In fact, you should make your child aware that even if a person is dressed like a cop, if mommy and daddy sent them, they will know the secret word. If they do not, do not get in the car with them. Don’t make it the word obvious or easy.

Never get into the car/van/ice cream truck with anyone: I don’t care if Mr. Frosty is giving away a three-scoop chocolate covered waffle cone for free. Do not get in that ice cream truck. I don’t care if it’s Anthony Wiggle and he promises you a place on stage in the next tour. I don’t give a crap if it’s the son of Mommy’s best friend. Unless Mommy tells you it’s okay, just assume that it is not!

Never go into a room alone with anyone: It could be the room mother, the priest, your dad’s best friend, an older student or even your neighbor, do not go into a room alone with an adult that is not your parent.

No one is allowed to touch your private spot: No one for any reason ever, unless it’s your parents or the doctor when she is examining you, is allowed to even see your private area. If they try, scream and run away. Tell the first authoritative adult you find and make them call your parents.

Scream, twist, shout, bite, scratch, poke them in the eyes, punch, kick them in the balls and wiggle away: It’s harder to abduct the squeaky wheel than the docile “yes” child. Thank God my girls can scream like banshees. I told them if someone picks them up and tries to take them (I don’t care if we know them, unless it’s a family member who has express permission to do so) SCREAM! Scream like your life depends on it, because it does. It will attract attention and the abductor may just drop you and run away because he/she doesn’t want to be caught.

Never answer questions asked by strangers on the street or give an adult directions: Adults know that they are running the risk of being considered a pedophile or straight up creep if they try to talk to a strange child on the street. Adults don’t approach children for help or directions; if they do, this should be a red flag. Run away.

Kids should always travel in pairs and not go off alone: If you are at the park or on the playground at school, in the store with mommy or on a field trip, never go off on your own. Stay with your chaperon. Stay with a group. It’s harder to steal a kid who is with a group of witnesses. It’s much easier to grab the quiet kid who goes off or hangs back by himself.

Don’t take candy, ice cream, money or toys from strangers: If an adult that you don’t know calls you over to them to give you candy, ice cream or a toy don’t go. This could be a tactic to get you near enough to them to grab you. Besides, you don’t know this person and they should not be giving you treats, regardless.

These are a few of the tips we teach our girls to help them stay out of harms way and hopefully, to prevent being abducted.  Also, I recommend practicing what to do if someone gets his or her hands on your child so that your child knows how to react and doesn’t just freeze up.

What do you teach your child to do in case of an attempted abduction? Would your child know to fight back?

Photo Source: Clarkston SCAMP

  • http://mommeetsblog.wordpress.com Rebecca

    Great post with important information. I also feel it is very important to teach children self defense. We enrolled my son in karate when he was 8 years old. It has taught him not only effective self defense techniques but has given him a world of confidence. They emphasize defense, not offense, so he knows not to “show off” or use his skills to intimidate (unless necessary). It has also taught him how to be more aware of his surroundings. His teachers also review what to do in cases of “stranger danger” and bullying. I feel it is beneficial for both boys and girls.

  • Practical Parenting

    Great post with very important info. This is such a scary topic but very necessary. We talk about strangers a lot.

  • http://www.twobearsfarm.com/ Lisa @ Two Bears Farm

    I attended a session on this a couple of summers ago, and they said to teach your child to specifically yell “You’re NOT my MOMMY/DADDY!” If they just yell no or help, people might assume it’s just a family conflict and not step in.

  • http://adoptivelegacy.com/ AdoptiveLegacy

    Although I hope nothing like that ever happens to my children I’m glad to see such a well formed list.  More people need to take off their rose colored glasses, and realize that there are monsters out there. 

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