When I was a new mom, it seemed like everyone else who’d ever popped out a kid was brimming with advice they couldn’t wait to flood my mind with, insisting they were right and I was wrong.
At first, I thought it was because I was relatively young at the time and these women had children much older than mine. Not the case. I later ran into moms on the playground who were my age and had kids my daughter’s age, and yet they still felt like they needed to point out everything I was doing “wrong.”
So what do you do? Those know-it-all moms may not always realize how impolite they’re being. In some cases, they’re legitimately trying to help, like the group of more experienced moms who kept trying to feed my baby snacks she’d never had before even after I’d told them I didn’t want them toâ€”the first time I met them.
Later on, though, there were plenty of comments from “competitive” moms that grated on my nerves about how shy and timid my daughter was on the playground and what I needed to do or didn’t need to do, andâ€¦blah blah blah.
You know how you can always think of a snappy comeback long after the moment has passed? Yeah, that happened. So here’s a list of things to do or say when those know-it-all moms swoop in:
“Yeahâ€¦I’m just seeing how badly I can screw her up without really trying.” Scandalous. But who doesn’t like a healthy dose of sarcasm midday?
“Well, you see, this is an experiment. I plan to have a lot of kids, raise them all differently, and then hang out on playgrounds and pediatricians’ offices to share my wisdom.” She’ll probably never speak to you again, though, so be warned.
“My mom told me the same thing. Nice shoes.” Nothing like a change of subject to get the point across. Hey, you’re even throwing her a compliment!
“Looks like the kids are having a blast. I think I’ll go join them.” At this point, you pretend to be a monster (if your kid’s into that) or just start swinging from the monkey bars.
I’ve somehow avoided the pushy know-it-all moms lately. Would I really be able to say any of these out loud? Maybe. Maybe not. But just thinking them would probably be enough to let me smile, nod, ignore her, and let my daughter continue to enjoy herself.
Photo credit: Sangudo