Books to Help You Be a Better Stay-at-Home Mom

by Tonya Wertman on June 28, 2012

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It’s been three years since I became a stay-at-home mom and to be honest, I’m still getting used to it. The no schedule thing and uncertainty that comes with each day, not always showering on a daily basis because Play-Doh and Legos always come first, but never before caffeine! It’s definitely gotten easier, but I’m still not all together comfortable with it.

A schedule is key and I suppose we have that most days: preschool on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, swim lessons on Tuesdays and afternoons filled with play dates, visits to the park, zoo, library and pet stores.

No matter what, we get out of the house, for my sanity, just as much as my son’s. I like to say, I’m a stay-at-home mom that does anything but stay at home.

Some days, however, it feels like the walls are coming in on us and that’s when I have to take a minute for myself and regroup. Sometimes it’s something as simple as taking a walk around our neighborhood or loading him up in the car to for a frozen yogurt run. Fresh air and a change of scenery always seem to do wonders.

Tips I learned from these two books also helped immensely and if you are looking for some coping mechanisms, then check them out for yourself!

The Stay-at-Home Survival Guide: Field-Tested Strategies for Staying Smart, Sane, and Connected While Caring for Your Kids by Melissa Stanton ($17.00).

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This is a very helpful handbook on everything you should know as your home’s “CEO”, written in a tone that neither talks down to you nor over-simplifies things. I gained great insight into things I hadn’t ever considered before, such as social security, insurance, managing money, etc.

In Praise of Stay-at-Home Moms by Laura Schlessinger ($25.99).

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Love her or hate her, the good doctor sure knows how to make a SAHM feel on top of the world! If you are a fan of Dr. Laura’s radio program, you’ll love how she incorporated her radio show into the book by including actual transcripts from callers. An easy read and incredibly uplifting and reassuring, I have recommended this book to all my SAHM friends.

My only negative comment is that In Praise of Stay-At-Home Moms does come off a bit judgmental toward mothers who chose to work outside the home and I would not recommend it to a mother who is having a tough time with that decision.

So while I don’t have meetings to attend or a closet full of suits to wear anymore, I plan, I schedule, I organize, I manage, I orchestrate, I clean, I cook (sort of), I run errands, I live for nap time, me time, friend time and date nights.

Staying at home is not easy. Slowly but surely, I’m learning to embrace this role, but I’d be lying if I said that didn’t spend a lot of time day dreaming about returning to work full time.

On one hand, I can’t imagine having anyone else spend as much time with my son as I get to or allowing them to be such an active participant in his growth and development. I do realize how lucky I am that I am his primary care giver, but on the other hand, there are days that I would give my right arm to have a 7:30 meeting and drop him off somewhere along the way.

It’s an age-old argument, but as I see it, being a mom at home or not, is hard work. No matter where you do it from.

For some, returning to work is a financial necessity and not a choice. I get that. And when I think about being a SAHM in those terms, I know I’m one of the fortunate ones.

Are you at stay-at-home mom? If so, is it by choice? Do you miss working? If you stay at home, what are your favorite resources?

Photo credits: Ed Yourdon, Amazon

  • http://www.citybabyliving.com/ Emily (CityBaby Living)

    I chose to stay home about a year ago when my daughter was almost 4 and I realized that there was only 1 more year until kindergarden and I was missing it spending all my time at a job I hated. And it has been hard, great, fun, frustrating and rewarding all at the sametime (and sometimes within the same hour!) My biggest challenge has been to find a community – in my area there weren’t a lot of SAHM’s looking for more friends of an older child. I plan on looking for a part time job when she starts school because I do miss being with adults and using my brain in a different way than I do at home. I feel incredibly lucky to even have the choice though. Thanks for the 1st book suggestion – I think I’ll skip the Dr. Laura but check out the other one!

  • http://www.mamasmonologues.com Kimberly

    I chose to stay home 3.5 years ago when I was pregnant and it has been the best decision I’ve ever made. Like you said, I can’t imagine somebody else spending that kind of time with my kids. But at the same time, sometimes it’s hard. There is no adult interaction and being in the house makes me stir crazy. Thanks for the book recommendations! I’ll have to check them out!

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